Friday, November 17, 2017

Movember At The KSA

KSA Logo - Moustachified.jpg
We’re nearing the end of November, and if you’ve been wondering why you’ve been seeing a hairier campus than usual we’d like to shed some light on the situation. Over the last decade and a half, a mo’vement has sprouted on the upper lip of men worldwide. The origins of this movement lie in Melbourne, Australia - where, in 2003, couple of brucies (men) met at their local boozer (bar) to shout (buy) a couple of butchers (drinks) and yabber (talk)* about how out of style moustaches had become. They decided, on a lark, to bring the ‘stache back, and like all good jokes, they decided to take it a little too far. Thus, they invited 30 of their mates to do their best Tom Selleck impersonation and become Mo-Bros. The challenge was simple - every Bruce would pay a 10 Didgeridollar entry fee and compete for the best moustache by the end of the month (which just so happened to be November). The proceeds of this entry went towards the Prostate Cancer Foundation of Australia.

*Editor’s Note: Yes, we know Australian slang is confusing.

The following year the concept was formalized and they were able to find more than 450 men willing to participate. As the tradition (and moustaches) grew, the Movember Foundation was created and a men’s health awareness campaign was launched. The campaign addresses 4 key issues that have been identified as key risk factors in the early death of men: prostate & testicular cancer, mental health, and physical inactivity. By 2007 the Movember movement had made its way across the world with more than 130,000 participants and over $21.5 million Didgeridollars raised - that’s around $21 million Beaver Bucks! At the time of this post there have been over 5 million participants, nearly 16 million donations, and over $80 million raised for various charities.

This year Canada has the third largest Movember registrants worldwide - losing out to the original moustachioed mavericks in Australia, and those pesky Americans. At the KSA we’re getting involved in two ways:

  1. You can catch us at KPU rec’s Movember 17 Dodgeball Tournament.
  2. To help contribute to the cause, the Kwantlen Student Association has signed onto the Movember Foundation and needs your help to raise some coinage.

Below is a smattering of the ‘staches that the KSA has produced this Movember, ranked of course (this is a blog after all):

The Duster
Sported by Tanvir Singh, President of the KSA. The Duster is on its way to becoming a great stache, but it needs a little more time before it’s ready for the spotlight.
Verdict: 2.25 High Schooler’s First Lip Hairs/5

The Half-Way to Handlebar
You may mistake Munir Dossa’s (the KSA’s current Students of Colour Representative) stache for a beard, but you’d be mistaken. With just enough room to sneak by and qualify as a lip toupee However the lack of commitment on the curl has us hesitant to call this moustache great.
Verdict: 3 Gastown Hipsters/5

The Subtle Stubble Upgrade
On the other side of the stache/beard divide is Matt Hunt, KSA events coordinator. There is certainly a moustache there - don’t get us wrong. We just can’t rightfully call this a valid contribution to the Movember effort.
Verdict: 1 Midlife Crisis Beard/5

The Woodsman
As with the Subtle Stubble Upgrade, Jeremy McElroy, KSA General Manager, has a beard and not a moustache. However there’s no denying that there’s a great stache there just waiting to be uncovered. There are rumours that if the KSA is able to raise enough money, we may just get to see what his chin looks like. Until then, the best we can do is rate him just above the Subtle Stubble Upgrade.
Verdict: 2 Okay Lumberjacks/5

The Wizened Selleck
The Mighty Stache.jpg
The GSTM, or “Greatest Stache of Them All™” is sported by Adam Rhodes, GrassRoots Cafe manager. Rumour has it that he’s been growing it since before Tom Selleck had even contemplated whiskers. We wouldn’t ask him about it though, this isn’t the kind of ‘stache that you question.
Verdict: 5 Magnum PI’s/5

Bonus: The Minimalist
Jay Reedy, Vice-President Student Life, (and author of this post) once attempted to grow a moustache. After 2 weeks this was his progress. Note the adherence to minimalism, the esoteric eccentrism of daring to call this a moustache. Truly this is a stache for an underappreciated, and misunderstood Mo-Bro.

Verdict: 0.5 Disappointing Genes/5

- Jay Reedy (VP Student Life)

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